I am hurting

It feels like hope is gone. All my life I have had hope, through all the bad in my life. I knew the angels and saints and God were there but the last 1 year I have struggled and struggled. As I write this I want to cry. I need help I am so alone. this lonliness suffocating me.i m afraid i will loss my control .Will God help me?Since my birth i have the stories of hurts and crisis.i hope there is a light at the end. Or am I just that mistake that god has made? People say God doesnt make mistakes but maybe he did. I am hurting, sorry for taking everyones time.